What Empaths Should Know In Order to Get Greater Enjoyment Out of Life
From years of offering healing support to empathic people, I have discovered that the way empaths process their empathic responses are different, and what they need to do to remain balanced mentally, physically and emotionally also vary.
Here are six insights about empaths and what you can do to enjoy your special qualities and experience the true gift the empathic nature was meant to be.
1. Empaths tend to have softer boundaries.
People who are highly empathic seem to live in a world with less of a concrete sense of boundaries than many of the rest of us. This is actually, a highly sensitive state of spiritual awareness, and a truer experience of how energy exists beyond our human, physical perceptions. The boundaries certainly get thinner as we become conscious of our oneness with all life. Because empaths can find it difficult to know how to function comfortably in this world, it is challenging to know how to be with their empathic nature.
In response to the thin walls empaths can experience, I have noticed that some empaths become quite removed from their empathy—hard, distant, critical, or very mental—as a way of protecting themselves from the deep empathic responses they otherwise experience. This distancing from their empathy is a kind of shield that is often erected unconsciously as a desperate act to ensure greater inner peace.
I’ve met empaths that were upset with themselves for “taking on energy that wasn’t theirs,” when from my perspective, they were having a natural empathic reaction. Empathic reactions are as natural as jumping and making a shocked or scared sound when we are unexpectedly frightened by something. In the physical world, we consider a shocked response when we are frightened to be natural, but in the spiritual/emotional world, many of us have catalogued natural empathetic responses as somehow, unnatural and needing to be controlled.
2. Empaths tend to be highly compassionate.
When I do a reading for someone, especially an empath, I’m often able to glimpse the world from their perspective. What I’ve noticed about empaths is that they are highly compassionate, deeply affected by aspects of life, and their balance is easily affected by what is happening around them.
Energetic shielding, emotional protection and other forms of distancing yourself from compassion and caring, rarely works well. For one thing, when an empath does this, they are also cutting themselves off from the flow of healing energy within you, and potentially making themselves more stressed and physically ill.
3. Empaths do better when they know how to be with their compassion.
Empaths seem to do better in the world, when they learn how to be with their depth of their compassion and use their healing gifts to maintain balance and transform disharmony. And empaths have unique ways of doing this. Some need to process the energy through themselves, regardless of their initial reaction. Some, learn early signs that help them begin using their healing gifts and energy to intervene and assist before they would otherwise experience an empathic reaction.
Still others must evolve into a constant state of compassion, so that there is no dramatic effect caused by outside influences. I have met empaths that needed to remain in a relaxed and open state, allowing whatever came through to simply pass through. They work diligently on releasing judgments and attachments so that they are in a constant state of loving openness and flow.
4. Empaths often do better when they are using their energetic healing gifts regularly.
Many find their empathy easier to live with as they become familiar with their own energetic healing gifts and begin to use them consciously in service to whatever is calling to them for assistance—Mother Earth, animals, plants, human physical challenges or emotional distress, planetary transformation, inter-planet relationships, or connections to other realms of consciousness. In my experience, most empaths have some unique method of maintaining inner peace and balance, as well as being of assistance.
If you are not certain about your abilities, take a look at my Psychic Powers and Psychic abilities audio course. It can help you discover your gifts and even begin learning how to use them!
I’ve known an empaths that works with crystals to assist in keeping the light-grid around the earth in balance. When the grid is out of balance, she feels it and must attend to her energy work. Another empath needs to either be active with her hands in the dirt of Mother Earth or at the very least meditating with Mother Earth, allowing anything she has picked up from her clients to flow through her and into the Mother for healing.
Still another empath maintains his sense of humor and composes music in order to move emotional charges through him, with those charges and imbalances becoming expressions of beauty. One of my closest friends is an earth empath and whenever a volcano is about to go off, she gets early warning signs that are letting her know she needs to meditate with the volcanic energy of the Mother. If she doesn’t she gets migraines. If she does, she is at peace in service to the earth.
5. Empaths needs to attend to their emotions regularly in order to maintain emotional stability.
Empaths that are emotionally empathetic need to tend to their emotional bodies regularly (for most—daily). Empaths I work with often report that they find it easier to feel empathy for another or the planet than to feel empathy for their own emotions. The good news is that whatever the source of the emotion, emotions are universal. If you lovingly hold an emotion for another, you are affecting your own emotional body as well. Many find this Holding Guided Meditation (here as an audio recording) helpful for being present to emotions (whatever their source), and allowing them to easily release.
6. Empaths can find empathy for themselves with practice.
For those of us who are deeply sensitive and have been abused, we can find ourselves having turned off empathy for ourselves, seemingly as a way to survive the woundedness and insensitivity of others. However, our own emotions are conduits to the oneness we all share through the human, emotional experience. When we cut ourselves off from painful emotions, we have difficulty feeling positive ones, and in the process we become numb or depressed. An empath ultimately needs empathy for him or herself as well.
Most of all empaths have a tendency to feel empathy for their own pain and the pain of others, but what is truly needed is positive empathy—meaning love for themselves and others. An empath needs his or her love for themselves to out-weigh any pain they feel.
Then, once he or she is developing a more expansive state of self-love, an empath has the proper foundation for holding others in the loving compassion that heals. My Breakthrough Healing System was designed to help empathic and sensitive people connect to a more expansive state of self love—the kind of love that creates physical and emotional well-being.
Empaths are profoundly unique, and it is their empathy—their great compassion—that makes them so special. Learning how to be with the energy rather than running away from it seems to bring empaths the greatest sense of peace, in whatever way they are called to use their gifts and be with their compassion.
Wow–I am a 65 year old cancer nurse and am just learning, for the first time, that all of my feelings of aloneness and weirdness and sensitivity in my younger days–that it is all OK–and in fact, that I AM GOOD!!! Sounds almost silly but not really. The messages I got and the messsages I gave myself growing up were so damaging and destructive. When I read some of the points above, I feel that I have found a home, at last, a safe home where I can finally, in these years, be grateful and happy for how I am. I never knew this before. How can it be that I never found this out till now? I have a son who seems is also an empath and now that I know this is me and probably him, I can support him and help him see what a really great person he is and how the ways he suffers is beautiful and rich and not a sign of weakness. Really, to learn this now is such a huge relief–to no longer fight my identity but instead to see I have a gift.
Misa Hopkins says
Mariah, it seems a lot of us don’t find out how empathic we are until we are older. The sensitivity and abilities that come with our empathic nature aren’t typically acknowledged. Isn’t it wonderful to finally realize all those parts of you actually make sense and serve a purpose. So glad you now know how much you belong and just how special you are!
Thank you as I really needed to hear that. Only late in my life did I find out I was an Empath (from Judith Orloff’s book “Second Sight”.) So easy to try to tune out instead of tuning in. I appreciate your concrete suggestions and realize I have work to do to become ‘sensitive’ again and appreciating it as a gift and not just a pain. Thanks again and have a great Christmas season!
Misa Hopkins says
Glad it helped. Most of all, it’s wonderful that you are choosing to connect to your sensitivity. No doubt there are some beautiful gifts inside you just waiting to come out and play! 🙂 Blessed Holidays to you too!
It has been such a gift to read this positive and compassionate understanding of empaths. I have been searching online for information and have come across so many fearful articles. It has been really good to hear about the variety of reactions and the diversity of finding one's own balance and acceptance of being an empath. I will share this with my daughter, as we are both discovering the truth of our emotional sensitivity, and it will be great to share something upbeat. I had read that an empath creates a 'copy' of the feelings of another – it is theirs but not theirs at origin, if that makes sense. Many empaths, well most really, are very adept at this. Once the copy has been made – what to do with it then. Most empaths hold onto the copy, either unconsciously or consciously – thinking it will help – but the truth is you are free to do what ever you wish with this copy, transform it through your own unique talents. it was lovely to hear about empaths working with Mother Earth, music etc. to transform their 'copy'. I also loved to hear your thoughts on empaths experiecing the oneness of life through this gift as i had also been thinking along these lines – so that's been a good confirmation for me of my own intuition. Many thanks.
Karen, that is excellent news—to know that your own intuition felt confirmed. It can be difficult to trust those intuitive impulses in today's world, with so much emphasis on logic. Yet, when you are empathic, as you know, you simply must listen to your inner wisdom. I love being empathic and love meeting others that are too! We came here with very special gifts to help ourselves, other people, and the Mother Earth herself. The more we willingly accept our gifts and learn how to use them in a good way, the more we enjoy our journey. I truly hope you and your daughter discover all the delights of being the beautiful empaths that you are!
WOW This explains everything that I was and am experiencing very helpful, accepting myself being empathic is a total relief of everything I've been absorbing and feeling around me. I thought I was a love addict with no boundaries. I did have difficulty with protecting myself the way people were telling me and it wasn't working. I thought I wasn't doing it right. That explains it just go with it…. Thank you so much
You are so welcome. My elder and medicine teacher shooed me out the door into the world when I started closing myself off from the world for protection. She taught me to use my gift in service (getting used to the occasional sense of overwhelm) rather than shield myself. I'm glad I could pass along her wisdom in a way that could validate who you are as an empath! 🙂
Really interesting thankyou
You are welcome. 🙂