Visiting with a couple that is very dear to me, I was recently reminded that some of the best self-healing advice you can ever hope to get is from a source most of us tend to ignore. This source knows you better than your own doctor knows you, and sees the emotional roots behind your physical challenges faster than your therapist will discover them.
This source is very likely one you don’t like to listen to in regard to your health and probably should if you truly want to embody your greatest physical well-being.
Your family sees you in a way no one else sees you. They know about the foods you eat that only aggravate your health problems. They know how much exercise you actually get in a day. They know what makes you tense and aggravated, and they know about many of the emotional wounds from your past.
While no one likes to harped at, given the opportunity, most family members would gladly tell you what changes you could make that would help you enjoy a happier life.
Now this kind of advice needs to taken carefully. Some believe that being saved within specific religions or spiritual beliefs is a person’s ticket to health, and if you have read my book, The Root of All Healing, you know that I have not found that belief in any specific religion or spiritual practice is better than an other religion, or even necessary for healing.
Some people swear by allopathic medicine, others by natural medicines, and still others by energy medicine exclusively. I’ve interviewed and observed people that have been healed using a variety of approaches, and I have observed that what works best for one person does not necessarily work well for another.
I’m not suggesting that you listen to and do everything your family recommends. I am suggesting that they often see why you are ill before you do. So often we close out our families views when they often see us more clearly than any one else in our lives.
If we give our loved ones (that can include very close friends as well as family members) a chance to lovingly share what they are seeing, we can get a glimpse into ourselves that can quickly put our lives into perspective.
My husband and I spent a week with a wonderful man that is slowly deteriorating his body. His wife has a very good understanding about why that is happening, both physically and emotionally. It concurred with what I was picking up psychically. But he was resolute in refusing to listen to her.
If he could allow himself to consider and respond to her observations, he would have a focal point for going even deeper, and getting to the emotional trauma that began his journey of physical suffering.
In order for medicines and healing treatments to work well for him, he would need to release the pain of the original trauma.
Sometimes we are so used to the pain, that we simply perpetuate it by continuing down a path of continued self-harm.
It is difficult to go through that and it is difficult for our family. I’ve seen people drive away everyone they loved because they refused to heal the real pain behind it all. They just didn’t want to admit that the real problem was inside them.
If your family has been trying to get through to you, consider, just consider, giving them 10 minutes to tell you what they see about how you are living your life. Ask them to share in a kind and gentle way so that you can actually hear what they can offer you.
And then, if you have the courage, follow-up on their observations, and ask your family for their support as you make some changes in your life. If they love you enough to be with you when you are in your greatest pain, imagine the kind of love and joy you will experience with them as you self-heal.
as a child I was double-jointed and could put my legs behind my head and walk on my hands. Despite chronic lower back, due to osteopenia and scoliosis I am still agile. Some 40 years ago a Pychic who led our Healing circle, took my hand, looked at the palm of my hand and said " you have a long life -line Natalie. Although you will have a bad back in your later life, you will remain spry ".I do not know why I never sort advice on how to avoid this. Inspite of this spinal imbalance, even when in pain, I still tend to walk fast, and refuse help getting out of cars etc.( This has no connection to your lesson today, but I feel the urge to seek your comments please.) Be Happy
It is true that sometimes the advice we receive does not feel accurate or provides an insight into something we would like to change. It is important to pay attention to the beliefs that we adopt as our own. I use the Creation Meditation to hold such beliefs in love until they finally release and are no longer part of my consciousness. http://www.newdreamfoundation.com/forums/index.ph… You might find this or some other kind of meditation helpful. What impresses me most is that you have given yourself the gifts of energy and flexibility in your body, regardless of the condition of your spine. What a beautiful way to choose to live your life!
Elizabeth Gibbons says
Great article. I think it is our ego, our persona, that prevents most of us from being willing to listen to those closest to us. So many believe that if our "faults" or past is made known then we will lose the love or respect of others. And we also don't even want to admit some of these things to ourselves.Yet, that is what sets us free, to realize that is not who we really are and to learn from the forks we have taken in our life that has led to where we are now. It is part of the evolution of each of us.
Yes, I too believe that our ego does its best to protect us from feeling bad about ourselves in anyway. But sometimes we need to see the aspects of ourselves that are not pleasing us in order to bring our love to the places in our lives most needing our attention. A willingness to listen to our loved ones takes great courage and a certain amount of humbleness, but the rewards are beautiful.
in some respects I agree with you but some familes and loved ones are so narrow in their thinking that they cannot understand, or don't want to understand, when you turn your back on alopathic medicine. It is being proved day after day that many medicines are worse for you than the problem. Having said that am aware that there are many alopathic medicines out there that do actually save lives. It is a choice for the person themselves – I am trying to listen to the one person who really knows best what is going on for me and that is my Higher Self – I ask questions in the quiet of time and amazingly get some fairly strong answers, not always the answers I want to hear, and so take notice. Yes my family and friends are wonderful and loving, but sometimes we have to walk our own road and learn our own lessons – our karma after all.
You are making some important observations. Sometimes taking the advice of our family members is not in our best interest. What treatment to choose is not necessarily an area in which family members are qualified to make recommendations. The area in which family members might have some insight has more to do with life-style choices. Frequently, they see changes we need to make—such as taking more time to rest, eating better, finding a way to experience greater inner peace, etc. It is these kind of insights that can be helpful if we are willing to hear. And I agree, ultimately connecting with our own Divine Guidance provides us with the clearest insights about our course of direction when it comes to choosing our treatments.
What you have written about family input makes a lot of sense but it makes me feel sad. I have no family and I am also deteriorating no matter what I take, try or do. I embarked on a pilgrimage of deep soul searching by looking at the past traumas and some I know from previous life times but it appears not to be working on the physical level. I want to know what I still cannot see and would love to find someone who can do that but al the people, therapists etc just say 'let go or forgive'. As far as I am aware I am leting go and really working on forgiveness, in fact I feel too sick and tired to bother with the anger and resentment I had. I just want to feel well. It doesn't make sense unless there are unseen people/entities that want me incapacitated. I am capable of insightful help and healing to others but sadly not myself.
I believe this is true with most of us. It is very difficult to see ourselves. If you doing a lot of introspective work, you might want to see if there is anything in Beating the Odds booklet that might be helpful. This is a free booklet that describes beliefs that sometimes get in our way. https://misahopkins.com/bookstore.
I also recommend the Creation Meditation for learning how to be with the variety of emotions that cause illness and that can be the result of illnesses. The meditation naturally creates forgiveness because you find peace with yourself and love for others by honoring the emotions that occur through present and past relationships. Once those raw emotions dissipate, there is room for life-giving energy. http://www.newdreamfoundation.com/forums/index.ph….
Every person I have every interviewed talks about moments, especially when they are exhausted and feeling overwhelmed, in which they must recommit to their healing. It truly is a process of one day at a time, and sometimes the progress is barely visible. But it is a process of learning how to love yourself more than you ever have before.
It takes great courage